Hello- I'm looking for a little insight into whether I should just give up here or pursue the issue. My son (8- diagnosed with autism and generalized anxiety) has gone to the school's ESY program for the past three years, since preschool. He is doing quite well academically (on grade level). He's made a lot of progress socially this year, however he still struggles a lot to converse with other kids and doesn't have any real friends. He also has frequent crying episodes at school and struggles with emotional regulation.
I got a phone call a couple of weeks ago from the case manager to inform me that he "does not qualify" for ESY this year because he's "meeting all his goals". I agreed that he's doing well academically but expressed my concerns for him about social skills and emotional regulation. I was told the school's program is not right for him and "not the kind of kids he needs to be around" to develop his social skills. She asked if I'd like a meeting and I told her I'd think about it and get back to her.
So, I decided that I agreed that the school's program was not appropriate for him but that I disagreed that he would be okay without some sort of social skills help over the summer. He also struggles a lot when there is a lack of routine and the ESY program in the past has helped to bridge the gap between the end of the school year and start of the next. So I asked that the school consider a local social skills group for him over the summer. I was told no- that he's made "substantial progress" and was sent the last data from December. I pointed out that some of the goals for December were actually not met (for example, regarding social skills his ability to initiate a conversation was a goal of 5/10 and he did this 4/10 times). So I asked if she could clarify what is meant by "substantial progress" and how does it relate to "meeting goals" in terms of ESY eligibility. So, she explained that if he is either "meeting goals or close to meeting goals" that is considered substantial progress.
The whole thing seems rather subjective to me- the data that they give shows me that he is making some progress, but I would not consider it "substantial" even though the school seems to. Essentially it seems that- like many other things we have encountered over the past few years- the team has made a decision without us and it doesn't really matter what we have to say about it. I have chosen to let a lot of things go because I really care about trying to have a good relationship with them, and because I want to focus on what I consider the most important. I try very hard to be reasonable and always polite. But I am so tired. I don't know whether to bother pushing the issue of ESY or not because it seems it's ultimately up to them anyway.
If anyone has any advice- even if it's "let this go, it's not a big deal"- I'd love to hear it. Thank you!
