*****Long Read Alert**** Thanks in advance!!
My name is Jennifer, I go by Jenn or Jenna. I just became a member Friday! I am optimistic about potentially meeting some local understanding,loving, PITA (Pain in the A**) moms when it comes to our children when they are not in our care. I have 6-year-old twin girls and a 15 yr old son. I honestly want some input, advice, resources, and or feedback on your thoughts on my current situation. Also if anyone knows any other Kindergarten schools in the area that have immediate spaces? Ican’t seem to find not one for my situation.
My daughters were going to PAELC. They started kindergarten this past August. My daughters’ names are Jade and Jada. Jade had an IEP In place from the Chester County Intermediate Unit which was updated in July of 2022 with her diagnosis of ADHD and DMDD, (Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder). She was doing so well at PAELC from August to the beginning of November. Around the time my husband and I officially separated. That’s when she started experiencing persistent irritability, anger and frequent, intense temper outbursts, and significant problems again at home and school. I notified the school when the separation happened because I thought they needed to put more emotional and behavioral support in place. After all, it wasn’t in her IEP as of date. They only had Learning Support, which she is above benchmark. I also thought I had a good relationship with her teacher, learning support specialist, supervisor of Elementary IEP services, the Principal, and all of the other staff members that were dealing with Jade. Unfortunately, that was not the case. Last month Jade wrapped a phone cord around her neck and they had to cut it off with scissors while she was escalated. She then tried to Jump out the second-floor window. I was called to pick her up that day they said she was extremely escalated and was hitting, kicking, and biting. I wasn't told of this information until 3 days later at an IEP meeting. They failed to do a suicide risk assessment, call mobile crisis, call me, or any of the guidelines from the Board of Education. To hear that my daughter did something like this was heart-wrenching. The fact she could have came home, and done it again hurts so bad. How didn't they notify me or take immediate action? Attempted suicide. I would have immediately come to pick her up and taken her to get an evaluation. They didn’t even tell the Superintendent. I didn’t get an incident report or anything. The report I got indicated she was escalated over bubbles because they told her to blow them on the carpet and not the floor. I went to pick Jade up immediately after the IEP meeting on zoom to find her back in the 2nd-floor classroom, which was a learning support classroom. The classroom was empty with the blinds taken down and the drawers drilled shut. Completely Empty. They had her ostracised like she was being confined and wondered why she was acting out. They didn’t allow her around any Friends even though she has never hurt anyone of her classmates. I haven’t had an issue at home with Jade since January 14th, the day she came home from the hospital. I had taken her to CHOP KOP on January 9th due to her aggressive and unsafe behaviors. On Day 5 of the stay, the psychology team apologized for the level of care provided by Children's Hospital of Philadelphia. The Psychiatrist then proceeded to say in front of a Psychologist that the Medical Team didn’t want to treat Jade because she was African American and this is a predominantly White hospital. The Psychologist, then said that the staff would be briefed regarding the restraints and procedures they were using on Jade. He stated they were not properly trained and they had medicated her on Ativan, Thorazine, Clonidine, and Methylphenidate. They used twelve people to restrain her after she was in a 4-point restraint because they didn’t use the correct restraints this is after giving her lines of Ativan which I didn’t even know. I told them they couldn’t give her any medications. Long story short, the hospital automatically opened up an investigation, and the OCR has officially opened up an investigation well. That was traumatizing, hurtful, and humiliating to be in the hospital for a week and be discriminated against. Words can't describe the way I felt and feel. We went for mental health and I called before I went they told me to bring her in because they had a behavioral health floor. Jade was placed on the surgical floor. I was told by a technician they had space on the floor, and that is his normal floor. I have never been told anything such degrading and racist as that in my life and the treatment!! I have PTSD from all this and don't trust a soul with my children as of right now. My girls have been going to CHOP since they were born and I have never experienced anything like that! So on top of what Jade experienced in the hospital, they medicated her so badly that she had delirium. She has had the same Therapist since 2021 she didn't even know who she was. During the time Jade was hospitalized school seemed to be so concerned, worried, and helpful. I kept them up to date every day on Jade's status, and what was going on. They assured me when she came back to school they would have the correct support in place and would continue to do their best. Because they understood how traumatic that had to be. PAELC Administrative staff, the IEP team, and her teacher have completely lost my trust, competence, integrity, care, and dependability for both of my girls! I pulled them both out the day I found this out. I know I am a PITA,(Advocate for my child) the best one she will ever havehttps://twemoji.maxcdn.com/2/72x72/2764.pngand the school knows this. I know my rights as a parent of a child with an IEP. I communicated with them so well and attended every meeting we had. Picked her up countless times informally. The Principal and IEP supervisor lied directly to me on the day of the incident. When I asked why no one called me they said they don’t know and that they had a busy day. I honestly still don’t know what happened in that classroom that day. No official incident report no nothing. Not what the antecedent was to her wrapping a phone cord around her neck and trying to jump out of a window. They suspended her for that! Can you imagine and called it aggression? Maybe if they would have done a suicide risk assessment, which certain staff members are trained to do we would know a little of what her thoughts were. She's 6 yrs old! She doesn't know the full concept of suicide. My son went from Schuylkill Elementary and is now at the High. I have nothing but outstanding things to say about his experience as a student and my experience as a mother. I also want to share the good about PAELC. Jada's teacher was awesome and specific staff members I interacted with. Their curriculum and program are good. The decision of having to pull Jada out of school as well was based on the relationship she has built with her teacher and friends was a rough and hard conversation to have with her. Unfortunately, safety comes first and my girls are the same value.
I'm not giving up on PASD but I have concluded, I have given up on PAELC. It's unnerving that the dishonesty started with Hierarchy the principal, the supervisor of elementary IEP services, and the Director of the IEP services of the whole district didn't disclose this information to me. I thought we were told in any field of life to use the chain of command, I had to bypass everyone and go straight to the Superintendent. I asked them to put their selves in a parent's shoes, would you have wanted to know? They all just looked at me and not one person said one thing. They ignored me completely. The only person from the school to Frankly answer the question was the Superintendent. He said not only were you supposed to know I was too! Sorry for the long story ladies but I was so happy when the girls started PAELC. With everything going on and not to mention I had appendectomy done 2/25 and was hospitalized for 7 days because it was ruptured. So I am not on mentally! I am tiredhttps://twemoji.maxcdn.com/2/72x72/1f634.pngNow I may have to homeschool for the rest of the year and find private for September. Any recommendations? Any suggestions? Also, would you have wanted to know if this was your child considering her diagnosis and traumatic experiences? Also, would you let your other child continue to go to the same school if you have had twins? Thanks in advance for any recommendations and support.