Here are a couple of things you could do:
1. Reach out to the Tennessee Department of Education and see if they have any resources or organizations that can assist you with advocacy.
2. Ask for an Independent Educational Evaluation (IEE), which would hopefully state an aide is necessary for your son to access the general curriculum. The school will probably ask your reason for requesting an IEE, which you don't have to give, but in this case I see no harm in telling them that it is because you disagree that an aide is not necessary.
3. Ask your son every afternoon after school what was taught today. Keep a journal of his responses to show he does not know or understand what is being taught.
4. Ask for all school work to be sent home or for access to it via an online platform. Look at this every day to see if he is understanding and doing the work.
5. Make sure the following accommodations are listed on the IEP document for your son:
- Frequent teacher check-in's for understanding of the assignment and material
- Have student state directions back to the teacher to ensure understanding
- Give directions in a variety of ways (verbal, nonverbal)
- "Chunk" assignments into smaller tasks/steps
- Frequent teacher check-in's to make sure student is working and doing the correct work
- Teacher check-in's to make sure assignment/work is completed
**If you put enough on the teacher (if necessary, of course), the teachers might actually help you in your request for an aide.
Here are some things you could say:
1. Point to the fact that his own teachers say he does not listen, pay attention, or do his work. State that this is a result of his disability and that it is denying him access to the general curriculum. Further state that because of this, he needs an aide in order to be provided a free appropriate public education (FAPE), which is required under the law. Don't think of it as him receiving "more services." Currently he is not being treated equally with his peers because he is being denied FAPE. He needs services to give him EQUAL access - not more. The word "discrimination" often gets their attention.
2. State that your son is entitled under the law to the least restrictive environment. If that is an aide in the general education setting, then that is what he should receive. Staff shortages are a nationwide problem, but they're not an excuse for not providing FAPE. See if they have tried to contract with an outside service provider. That is allowed and if needed for your son, should be pursued.
3. Since the title to your post is "1:1 Aide," I'm assuming that is what you are asking for. I would try a compromise first and ask if an aide could be placed in the classroom to help more students than just your son. Of course if this doesn't work and a 1:1 is necessary, then ask for that.