A couple of suggestions.
1. Ask what the role is of each administrator. What do they bring to the table in terms of knowledge of the child? Only one administrator is required (if even that) for purposes of fulfilling the LEA role. If they don't bring any additional information to the meeting, ask that the meeting be held without them if scheduled on a time they can't make it.
2. It's not true that high school IEP team members cannot be invited to a meeting held at the end of middle school. In fact, they SHOULD be invited. Unfortunately, a lot of times school districts don't know who their staff is going to be in all positions until right before the start of the new school year. But you could at least ask that the current case manager, special education teacher, principal or vice principal, etc., in the high school attend.
3. You could file a state complaint, because you are exactly correct - it is the school district's fault that the clock is running out. The "consequence" (out of compliance) is on their end. But I'm not sure if a state complaint gets you anywhere in this situation other than upsetting the school district. It might be used as leverage to get compensatory services over the summer due to all their delays.
4. Just to avoid the argument that "you declined special education services," I agree with JSD24 that you should probably sign some version of the IEP. As JSD24 suggested, try to get as much of what you want in there, but know that you can always add a statement after your signature that you agree with the exception of "x, y, and z."
5. I also like JSD24's suggestion of holding the IEP meeting in the summer by excusing the teachers, if a date cannot be agreed upon before then.
6. Lastly and most importantly (IMO), you are correct that the data is going to be stale by the time high school starts, but since the school evaluation was done in November, they can refuse to do another one until next November. My suggestion would be to request an IEE. It can be done over the summer and you can get an IEP meeting on the calendar for the beginning of the school year to go over the results, make changes to the IEP, and have all high school team members in attendance. Remember, you don't have to give a reason for your disagreement with the school district's evaluation to get an IEE - just a statement that you do disagree. But in any event, I think a nine month old (by the time high school starts) evaluation with summer regression is a good reason.